Pages

Thursday, January 23, 2025

Day Minus One - Narcissism and Heroism (by Paula Glessner)

Sometimes, I find myself wondering why someone like Donald Trump, who seems to crave admiration and adulation, doesn’t pursue the kind of actions that would earn him genuine love and respect from millions of people. Wouldn’t he want to be remembered as a true hero—someone whose legacy is not just about bluster, but about real, lasting accomplishments that uplift others? It’s a question that has stuck with me, and the answer, I think, lies in the complicated workings of human psychology.

Trump, like many people with narcissistic tendencies, appears to prioritize admiration over love. And while the two may seem similar on the surface, they couldn’t be more different in their essence. Admiration can be fleeting and shallow—it’s a quick fix, an applause from a crowd, a trending hashtag. Love, on the other hand, is deeper and more enduring. It requires consistency, humility, and a willingness to put others first. It’s about building trust and showing authenticity over time.

But earning love is a long game, one that involves sacrifice and vulnerability. True heroes don’t become beloved overnight; their actions, often quiet and painstaking, gradually reveal their character. Whether it’s tackling climate change, addressing systemic inequality, or advocating for the underprivileged, these efforts often lack the immediate gratification that someone like Trump seems to crave. They don’t come with instant headlines or thunderous applause—at least not at first. And they require a focus on others’ needs, not one’s own.

For someone like Trump, who thrives on visible and immediate validation, this kind of long-term investment in genuine good may not hold much appeal. I imagine that’s part of the reason he gravitates toward the applause of rallies, the dominance of his name on the news, and the spectacle of controversy. These moments provide the kind of instant gratification that likely feels safer and more rewarding to him than the quieter, slower path to building true love and admiration.

I’ve also come to believe that vulnerability plays a key role here. To earn love, one has to show humility and admit mistakes. That’s not easy for anyone, but it’s especially challenging for someone who has built an identity around being invulnerable and always “winning.” Genuine love thrives on trust and reciprocity—qualities that require an openness to critique and growth. In Trump’s world, however, admitting weakness or failure might feel like a threat to his carefully crafted persona.

It’s also worth considering that admiration, while more superficial, may feel more controllable to someone like Trump. Love depends on others seeing your true self and choosing to embrace it, flaws and all. But admiration can be cultivated through performance, by projecting an image rather than revealing one’s true character. For someone who values control as much as Trump seems to, admiration might feel like the safer, more manageable option.

This isn’t to excuse his behavior or suggest that he’s incapable of change. People can surprise us. They can learn and grow. But as I’ve watched Trump’s career and public persona unfold, it’s become clear to me that his pursuit of admiration, rather than love, has shaped not only his actions but also how he is perceived by the world. It’s a choice, conscious or not, to prioritize the fleeting over the enduring, the spectacle over the substance.

And yet, I can’t help but think of the legacy he could have if he made a different choice. Imagine a Donald Trump who tackled climate change head-on, championed social justice, or worked to unite a divided nation. Imagine the millions of people who would remember him not as a polarizing figure but as someone who used his platform and power to lift others up. That kind of legacy isn’t just admired; it’s loved. And it lasts far beyond the spotlight of the moment.

(Originally published on January 19th, 2025 in Reddit.)

No comments:

Post a Comment